One Hundred and Fifty Six in a row...

Part 4

The dinner had nearly reached it's conclusion. X was lecturing M regarding his newest epic novel. M seemed absolutely enthralled by X's every word much to his delight. X had come to the conclusion that this truly was a woman of sophisticated intellectual tastes.

X leaned over his gold splattered plate and confided in M, "The Bible was an incredible work of fiction but I really felt it left a lot to be desired, particularly in the character development department. My new novel plans to expand on these characters and their motives. I want to make them more believable."

"That should be very interesting. I cannot wait to read it!" said M.

"As soon as I complete it you shall be the first! Though I must you warn you that it may be some time as it is 52 thousand pages after all!."

"That's fine! I love reading long novels. It really gives you a chance to get to know the char-"

At that moment there was a loud crash as the restaurant doors flew open and shattered into a pile of of splintered glass. Into the restaurant walked the most imperfect man anyone had ever seen. His hair was a mess. He was unshaven. His clothes seemed like they hadn't been washed in nearly a week and a woman stood by his side who looked anything but wholesome.

A wave of shock and general dread overcame the entire restaurant. A waiter dropped over 40,000 dollars of melted gold on the floor and immediately lost his job. His wife would divorce him later that evening. A man sitting at one table who was about to take an enormous bite of gold covered pasta accidentally dropped it on his 145,000 dollar suit and wondered if the gold would leave a stain.

He was also smoking which as just about everyone was aware causes several life ending diseases and birth defects in women who are pregnant. Even more shocking was that certain women had been known in more barbaric times to smoke while their children were within two feet of them but this practice had been mostly abolished after the highly successful strategic nuclear explosion re-education program which occurred long, long ago. Fortunately most people could not remember this ever happening and were not inclined to feel sad about it.

Besides all of this it was well accepted that smoking smells bad.

As this abomination of a man made his way through the restaurant several beautiful, nearly perfect women, yet possessing a weak stomach, turned away to avoid throwing up the gold they had recently ingested. One waitress fainted and cracked her skull open causing three other women at another table to faint at this horrendous site.

X turned to see what the commotion that had disrupted his highly stimulating conversation was. He stared in shock for a brief moment at the site of this man who represented all that was indecent.

Regaining his composure he exclaimed, "That man represents all that is indecent!"

"I agree! Simply dreadful!" said M as she began to blush for reasons beyond her understanding.

"Why on earth does he have a sword?!"