Wednesday, September 30, 2009

One Hundred and Eighty Seven in a row...




Check it out friends! This guy is totally biting someone's head off! Pretty cool, huh? Ya, I thought so!

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

One Hundred and Eighty Six in a row...



This play makes no fuckin' sense, coach.

Basketball starts soon - ish. The weather tells me so. Actually I think it starts in about a month but look at football, they start advertising for the Super Bowl in March (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Super_Bowl).

Monday, September 28, 2009

One Hundred and Eight Five in a row...



Inspired by Tupac's fascinating music.

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Saturday, September 26, 2009

One Hundred and Eighty Three in a row...




Myrna was in her cabin and some guy told her before she went to her cabin that there was definitely some kind of ghost living there but she said she didn't believe him and so she went inside and a while later she was reading the paper and then she heard this tapping and then it stopped and so later she heard it again and it was louder then it stopped and she heard it again and she was pretty scared because it was happening a lot and so she went to look and it was scary when she saw it in her window but it went away.

Forget these ghosts! Where are my glow sticks at!?

Friday, September 25, 2009

One Hundred and Eighty Two in a row..




I drew this drunk. I have so much Pabst in my fridge. Come and help me drink it.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

One Hundred and Eighty One in a row...



I just made Twilight, like, 100% better.

Let's see that trailer again! WARNING GRAPHIC IMAGERY. I'm serious.



Also I might be gone in the coming days. I dunno exactly. So blah, blah, blah..

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

One Hundred and Eighty in a row...




Never take yourself too seriously.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Monday, September 21, 2009

One Hundred and Seventy Eight in a row...



Kerouac vs. An Average 47 year old man.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Friday, September 18, 2009

One Hundred and Seventy Five in a row...




Believe it or not, this is another flower...

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

One Hundred and Seventy Two in a row...

Picture Not Related




I have something I would like to talk to all of you all about that is very important to me. This is the most important blog post I have ever written so I insist that you all read it very carefully because it is the most important blog post that I ever write so I insist that you read it very carefully as this is the most important blog post that I ever write so I insist that you all read it.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Saturday, September 12, 2009

One Hundred and Sixty Nine in a row...

Ball that jack!


GO!! GO! GO!! GO!!!! 110 MPH INTO ETERNITY!!!

Ahem! Now if you don't mind an excerpt from Dean Moriarty in "On the Road".

"Now you just dig them in front. They have worries, they're counting the miles, they're thinking about where to sleep tonight, how much money for gas, the weather, how they'll get there - and all the time they'll get there anyway, you see. But they need to worry and betray time with urgencies false and otherwise, purely anxious and whiny, their souls won't be at peace unless they can latch on to an established and proven worry and having once found it they assume facial expressions to fit and go with it, which is, you see, unhappiness and all the time it all flies by them and they know it and that too worries them no end."

pgs. 209-210

Friday, September 11, 2009

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

One Hundred and Sixty Six in a row...




This is fan art.

LOL
My own momma says I'm thugged out:

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

One Hundred and Sixty Five in a row...




I was watching Dutch TV and there was a guy who had a lot of pigeons and he looked like this.

He was the happiest man I have ever seen.

Edit: Is it just me or is this happy man actually quite terrifying?

Monday, September 7, 2009

One Hundred and Sixty Four in a row...




I saw this girl who was taking a smoke break behind a fruit and meat store near our house when we were out food shopping. She had this cool green coat that she had to wear for work.

http://www.mtholyoke.edu/acad/intrel/orwell46.htm

Sunday, September 6, 2009

One Hundred and Sixty Three in a row...



For Charlie who graciously let me borrow his tablet (completely dust covered mind you) which I have neglected to use most of the time I was here. I am a huge jerk.

I know how much you like furry art Charlie and I sincerely hope you are excited about this one.

Cheers.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

One Hundred and Sixty in a row...



I am away from computers for the next 3 days (as far as I know) so no updates for that time.

You know how this works by now.

Update: Our friend might have the internet so there may be no update delays. Stay tuned.

Update 2: Because I had originally wanted to tie this drawing in with my ongoing assault against literature and the English language I shall now take the time to continue that mission and add a part of the saga here for you now - here.

Part 6

Aside from a delirious woman sobbing uncontrollably in the far corner of the restaurant just about all of the people in the building had stopped their panicking to stare in complete amazement at the disgusting man who was now strangely holding this woman's hand and who some men, despite being completely shocked by this interaction, noticed had quite glittery eyes much like that of an ocean planet. One particularly jealous woman thought to herself, "I wish my eyes were glittery."

M was at a loss for what to do next. Part of her wanted to go with this horrible man and live with him in a small one bedroom cottage near a magical, sparkling lake. Inside the lake there could be several species of fish that he could catch and cook for her over an outdoor grill. Perhaps he could find a swordfish in this magical lake. She had never had swordfish before.

There they would love each other until the end of time and possibly beyond that if they were ever to find a fountain of youth near their lakeside cottage. How wonderful it would be to find a fountain of youth!

The other more conscious part of her had become aware of a most disgusting smell filling her nostrils. Beyond a shadow of a doubt the smell was coming from this man awkwardly holding her hand. It was a most awful smell consisting of horrendous body odor, rotten cheese, cigarette smoke, vomit, dog feces, and one hundred, give or take a few, rotting corpses. Even working as a janitor for the past 4 years she had never smelt anything that came within one hundredth of this awful smell.

Her nostrils burned and she placed her free hand over her nose to stop some of the smell but she was still overwhelmed. She held her breath but soon realized she could not breathe if she did and so she decided to stop holding her breath. She coughed twice.

There was also the matter of her hand being held by a man who happened to possess a rather large sword for reasons beyond anyone's understanding. She feared he would draw the sword and slice her hand off at any moment. It was quite possible he was a gatherer of hands and soon she would possess only one hand making it that much harder to clean toilets. This thought made her uneasy and she tried to put it out of her mind and think about fountains that granted immortality once more.

X who had been sitting wondering what would happen while becoming increasingly annoyed by all of this finally decided he would not take anymore of this man invading his space, with his horrible odor, trying to steal away his fantastic date. He quickly stood up and entered a most perfect karate stance and yelled, "You will put her hand down this moment or I will be forced to act violently against you!"

The man slowly turned his head toward X, stared at him for a moment, dug around in his nose with the small finger of his free hand, and calmly answered, "No."

There was a rumble in the distance. The lights flickered. The restaurant owner gasped and he felt a warm liquid coming out of his ears. He delicately touched his fingers to it. Surprised to see blood he thought about his new doctor and decided it would be a good idea to get his ears looked at as this sort of thing could not be normal at all. His old doctor had recently died from a severe cold and he hoped his new doctor was a more competent replacement. Pressing silk napkins to his ears he thought, "What kind of a doctor dies from a cold?"

The woman who had thrown up gold on her date a few moments ago screamed several offensive phrases not heard for hundreds of years in quick succession and then jumped up and ran out of the restaurant screaming. The sobbing woman in the back corner stopped crying and sat smiling serenely.

M stared in awe. A chill ran through her body. She had never heard such a powerful, yet beautiful, voice come out of such a disgusting, imperfect man. This man could probably bring an entire army to their knees with a single sentence - though that would be a bit ridiculous and was in fact not possible at all as it was well known that several bullets and bombs are needed to destroy most any army. Either way she was in awe at the amount of power this man's vocal chords held.

X was having none of it, however, and took a quick step back and unleashed a powerful kick directly into the disgusting man's face. His foot hit him squarely in the jaw with incredible accuracy and force. A single tooth which had been dislodged by the blow went soaring across the room. Tiny drops of blood trailed behind it like a comet gracing the night sky except the comet is a tooth in this instance you see.


One Hundred and Fifty Nine in a row...

EXTREME!!!



Tuesday, September 1, 2009

One Hundred and Fifty Eight in a row...



Part 5

The grotesque pair steadily made their way through the restaurant spreading hysteria all around. People screamed, cried, and did all they could to get out of sight of these two intruders. One desperate couple over turned their table and finished their dinner on the floor in behind it. It was becoming readily apparent that someone had to take action before total chaos ensued. The night needed a hero and it was the highly unlikely restaurant owner who decided he would be the one to take up the cause.

Straightening his tie and thrusting his chest out he approached the two and said with a wavering voice, "You are n-not welcome here! Please, um, go away. I will not have people throwing up and fainting in my restaurant! S-so go away."

The two disgraceful abominations stopped in their tracks and faced the owner to take a moment to observe him with a bored stare. The man scratched at his facial hair, yawned, and then stuck his small finger in his ear and wriggled it vigorously.

The restaurant owner looked away for a moment to keep from gagging but managed to stand firm against this onslaught of indecency. "That is disgusting. You sh-should be ashamed!", he said in his most commanding voice as he stuck a finger in the man's face while still making sure to maintain a safe distance.

These characters were an awful intrusion on his restaurant, however, he felt a bit of excitement he was not used to and found he was actually enjoying it on some perverse level. He lived in a near perfect world where no one ever bothered to disrupt his restaurant with obnoxious behavior, complain about service, or send food back for some absurd reason. Aside from this the thought of all these strangers witnessing his heroism was also quite thrilling!

M watched from a nearby table with growing interest. She could not be sure what she was feeling but with every disturbing action this strange man took her desire to be near him grew. It was all very confusing to her why she should feel this way. He was, after all, an incredibly disgusting individual yet she wanted more than anything to speak to him, to know him more intimately. She blushed - again.

X touched her arm lightly and whispered in her ear, "Do not worry my dear. I shall protect you. I know karate."

Meanwhile the restaurant owner, despite greatly enjoying his moment in the spotlight, was not making any progress removing these two from the premises. He began to ponder what other choice words he could use to further add drama and impact to his performance but the two turned and walked past him as if he were never there to begin with.

He hung his head dejectedly and pouted. His moment of glory had turned out to be a complete failure. Perhaps running a high priced, highly successful, post-post modern restaurant was all he was ever meant to do.

M could hardly believe it but the two were approaching her table. Her heart raced. The imperfect man stared directly into her eyes. She took a big gulp from her glass spilling some of it on her clothes. They stopped before the table and stood for a moment staring at M and her perfect friend.

M was about to lie to X about how disgusting the two were and that they should probably leave immediately when the man gently took her hand and held it up as if inviting her to come with him.

A woman at a table across from her threw up gold all over her date.